Book Review - “Everybody Always”

Goff, Bob. _Everybody Always: Becoming Love in a World Full of Setbacks and Difficult People_. Nashville, Tennessee: Nelson Books, an imprint of Thomas Nelson, 2018.

Raleigh Durham Airport. Sometime in 2017. It’s a Friday evening. I’m walking back and forth the long concourse trying to get at least a little exercise while waiting for a delayed flight.

I had just finished a long week of meetings and was ready to fly home. Bored, I start walking back and forth in the long terminal. After a few round trips I start riding the moving-walkways from end to end. On maybe my 3rd or 4th trip I hear someone call out. "Yager!" I turn and see a co-worker about to board a plane. He was holding a box of donuts. He was using one of his carry-ons for donuts. I ride the moving walkway to the end rather then jump over the wall, then walk back. I'm offered a donut. I believe I said, "no thank you." I was exercising wasn't I? With that one offer of a sweet treat a friendship was born. Yes, I'm that easy.

Turns out he and I both love our donuts and chicken sandwiches. We ended up spending the next few years traveling together often. In our discussions while driving rental cars, in airports, in offices, and while walking to the next donut shop, we also uncovered each of our own personal work to be better disciples and to be better Christians. This then slowly turned into discussions of books that we have read or that changed our life. Well . . . I think it is time to officially name our informal book club.

Welcome to the "Donuts and Doctrine Book Club". The name is is still being worked on - don't judge.

While this is not the first book we talked about or that he shared with me, I'm calling this the first official reading in this newly formed, and totally informal book club. He and I come from different faith traditions and slightly different beliefs, but we are both working to better follow Jesus everyday. We both work closely with others and are in some form of leadership with our congregations and/or our friends and fellow disciples. That means although things sometimes seem different between us, those differences are minor and make a great place to start conversations. Our beliefs are really 98% the same. Sharing books that have affected each of us, while we work on finding the best donuts has turned into a good way to stay in contact.

On a side note, I believe He actually documents his donut eating in a photo album. I may need to share some of those in the future. I've been less formal so far.

We may need a logo for the group - this was my first attempt. Consider this a messy draft. I'm sure this will change over the coming weeks.

Possible Logo - Draft only. Don’t judge me. There is an attempt at some symbolism here.

Okay, let's get to it - the book. He implored me to read "Everybody, Always" by Bob Goff. Bob Goff is a New York Times bestselling author and known for his unique perspective on life and faith. In this book Goff challenges readers to love everybody, always, even in the most difficult of circumstances. Through his own personal stories and experiences, Goff shows how loving others can change both their lives and our own.

** Note: There really is so much to like with about this book, but I'm going to start with one negative just to get it out of the way. Skip the next paragraph to get the the positives if you would like, they far outweigh my one complaint.

As I reviewed my notes and highlights this book continues to change me even weeks after completing it. I suspect that will be the case for a long while. But I have to admit I had a little trouble reading through a few of his personal stories. They seemed long and sometimes too perfect for the point he was making. Some stories were so perfect that at times it felt little self-aggrandizing which is exactly the opposite of his intent. Don't get me wrong, I really had to stretch to find something to knock this book on - it is that good. I guess I wish I could have learned more about the real Bob Goff by reading more about some failures, or challenges. Some of his stories felt almost too exemplary at times, which caused me to be skeptical. Maybe he is just that good or maybe all of what I was missing is covered in other places or in other books. Take that complaint with a grain of salt, I just wanted to get the negative out of the way first.

I was touched deeply quite a few times while reading. As I reviewed my personal notes and highlights from the book, my feelings became even stronger. His writing style was new to me, but on review, I took A LOT of notes, and wrote down many personal insights that will take sometime to try to work into my daily life.

I thought I would share just a few of the lines in the book that made me think. Below is a partial list of some quotes that stood out to me and made me reexamine my own discipleship. There are eleven examples below, but believe me, my personal list is much, much longer.

"Arguments won’t change people. Simply giving away kindness won’t either. Only Jesus has the power to change people, and it will be harder for them to see Jesus if their view of Him is blocked by our big opinions."

"Here’s the problem: when we make ourselves the hall monitor of other people’s behavior, we risk having approval become more important than Jesus’ love."

"It’s easy to agree with what Jesus said. What’s hard is actually doing what Jesus did. For me, agreeing is cheap and obeying is costly. Obeying is costly because it’s uncomfortable. It makes me grow one decision and one discussion at a time. It makes me put away my pride. These are the kinds of decisions that aren’t made once for a lifetime; they’re made thirty seconds at a time."

"People who are becoming love talk a lot more about what God’s doing than what they’re doing because they’ve stopped keeping score."

"Sometimes when we ask God for an answer, He sends us a friend. Figure out who He’s already sent to you."

"After a particularly bad day, God’s first words in the garden to Adam and Eve were simple ones: “Where are you?” It’s the first post-screwup conversation between God and the first family. God, of course, wasn’t talking about geography when He asked the question, and He’s not asking us about it now either. He hadn’t lost track of the ones He had created and He hasn’t lost track of you and me. Instead, I think God wanted Adam and Eve to figure out where they were with Him after they’d failed."

"Here’s the problem: when we’re busy getting our validation from the people around us, we stop looking for it from God."

"Simply put, if we want more faith, we need to do more stuff."

"Loving people the way Jesus did means living a life filled with constant interruptions."

"What I’ve found, though, is when we’re looking for a plan, God often sends us a person."

And one of my favorites, "Our problem following Jesus is we’re trying to be a better version of us, rather than a more accurate reflection of Him."

This inspiring and uplifting book is a must-read for anyone looking to live a more compassionate and fulfilling life. The way many of us look at our Christianity may differ in small ways, and some of our beliefs around the edges my differ, but this book will open your eyes to see the many areas of our lives in which we can do better to "become love."

Bob Goff is not your typical author. His background is very diverse and interesting. He is a lawyer, a diplomat, and a humanitarian who founded the non-profit organization Love Does. Through his organization, he has provided education and resources to children in conflict zones and helped to build schools in Uganda. Goff's unique blend of humor, storytelling, and wisdom makes "Everybody, Always" a book that is both engaging and thought-provoking. His stories of loving others in unexpected ways will inspire you to embrace a more selfless and generous way of living.

"Everybody, Always" challenged me to rethink my approach to life and relationships. It is a powerful reminder that love is not just a feeling, but an action that has the power to transform both the giver and the receiver. If you are looking for a book that will inspire you to live a more compassionate and fulfilling life, then "Everybody, Always" is a great place to start.

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